Oppikoppi 2014 Odyssey is less than 20 days away and excitement is mounting for what promises to be one of the highlights on the South African Music festival calendar. Oppikoppi is celebrating its 20th anniversary this year and boasts an excellent local line-up featuring the likes of Van Coke Kartel, aKING, Squeal, Springbok Nude Girls, 3rd World Spectator, Albert Frost, Dan Patlansky, Ard Matthews, Bittereinder, Boargazm, Bright Lights Big City, Fake Leather Blues Band, Gangs of Ballet, Liela Groenewald, Lucy Kruger, Man as Machine, Matthew Mole, Michael Lowman, Shortstraw, Newtown Knife Gang, PHFat, Taxi Violence, The Olympic, Urban Creep, Valiant Swart and others.
Besides this, no less than 15 international acts like Rival Sons, Wolfmother, The Inspector Cluzo, Cat Power, Editors, The Last Supper, etc are also playing.
This year will be the 16th time that I attend an Oppikoppi festival and 99 percent of you reading this, I’m so excited that I want to jump out of my skin – but for now I’m containing myself and giving you 10 essential tips to survive this epic festival, so get out those notepads.
1. Don’t be a doos – Yes, I know I’ve mentioned this before on this blog, but it remains the number one rule if you want to survive the 3 (or more) days of dust, tunes, good vibes and drunkenness at Oppikoppi (or any festival for that matter). Don’t play your Modern Talking mix tape on full blast if you’re that oke or chick who is still partying (or just woke up) at 7 AM. If you don’t want to replace the ripped-off exhaust on your pimped-out Nissan 1400 bakkie, you’ll listen to me.
2. Make friends – Being friendly costs fuck all. It doesn’t matter if your an appy working in a workshop in Pretoria West or a lawyer from Sandton, chances are that you’ll make new friends at Oppikoppi. Just let go of all the tension of work and ordinary city life and let go. You’ll find that the majority of people will be willing to buy you a shot at the bar or give you an ice cold beer (without you even asking them).
3. Keep the fire in your campsite under control – You are allowed to make fire if you want to braai at Oppikoppi, but that doesn’t mean that you should imagine that you’re frying a brontosaurus burger (like someone in an episode of the Flinstones). Make sure that your fire is not higher than your knees (and far away from your car’s petrol tank) and douse it with water before you head off to the entertainment area to watch bands. You still want your campsite to be there when you get back, right?
4. Don’t forget toilet paper – Yes, there are usually toilet rolls at the ablution block and at the porta potties, but there might be times when you might not be able to control your bowel movements, so keep a roll in your tent so you can catch a veldtie (even if you find the word to be disgusting).
5. Don’t forget condoms – Yes, there’s a lot of free love and passion walking around on two legs at Oppikoppi, but that doesn’t mean that you should be bumping uglies without using protection. Be wise and condomise – this will avoid that awkward VD shot at the doctor and noisy surprises 9 months after the festival.
6. Take wetwipes along – Face it, the majority of you will probably NOT be taking a shower at Oppikoppi (however disgusting that might sound). So stock up on those wetwipes so you can wipe the dust of your face, privates, arms (and legs if you really want to) and thank me later.
7. Pitch your tent and set up a place to sleep the minute you arrive – Speaking out of experience I can tell you that sleeping on a deflated mattress next to your unpitched tent is not a pleasant experience – Oppikoppi gets kak cold. It’s not fun pitching a tent when you’re drunk as a skunk either, so don’t put off pitching your tent and setting up a place to dos when you arrive at the festival.
8. Pace yourself – We all have that urge to shotgun 6 cans of Windhoek Lager when we arrive at the festival, but if you keep up that pace up through the WHOLE of the day you’ll probably not see sundown on the first day (and miss some of the best acts of the festival). “Vat dit rustig”. Remember that you have 3 days of awesomeness ahead of you and be careful not to dehydrate yourself and drink plenty of water throughout the day to keep those batteries charged. Remember: Oppikoppi is not for sissies.
9. Take along warm clothes – It gets kak hot during the day at Opppikoppi, so wear your summer best during the day, but keep that warm jacket / parka, beanie and jeans handy for the evenings. It gets colder than a witch’s heart at night and you don’t want to enhance that nasty cough that you might already be dragging with you to the festival.
10. If it’s something that you don’t want to lose, leave it at home – Unless you’re someone working at Oppikoppi, leave your laptop / tablet at home or if you’re one of those peeps driving to directly to the festival from work, lock your valuables in the boot of your car – don’t leave it in your tent. No one wants to go through the hassle of replacing an expensive electronic gadget after a festival.
Well, there you go, 10 Essential tips for surviving Oppikoppi 2014. If you have more tips that you can add to this list, feel free to comment.
Remember: Oppikoppi 2014 Odyssey will be held from the 7th to the 9th of August 2014 and tickets are selling like hot cakes. Remember to take one day off work if you really want to have a good time!
General admission tickets cost only R700 per person and includes camping for the weekend. This offer is available on the Oppikoppi Facebook page or on www.plankton.mobi. Please don’t buy tickets from unauthorized vendors, you don’t want the be that guy that gets denied entry into the festival.
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Watch this space for regular updates in the Music category on Running Wolf’s Rant.