Some Funny #AskHelenZille Tweets

Most South Africans know who Helen Zille is. For those of you don’t know, she’s the leader of the DA (Democratic Alliance) and the premier of the Western Cape province in South Africa. It might be Monday today but that doesn’t mean that Twitter has a shortage of funny users. Some time today people starting tweeting and using the #AskHelenZille hashtag.

The issue that inspired this hashtag is unknown to me. Apparently @helenzille “gave out cooking lessons last week” (according to @pfangirl), others say that “there was something in the newspaper yesterday” (according to @Ronitae). Maybe the general consensus among SA Twitter users is that she is a “know-it-all” (or at least that’s the vibe that I’m getting). Or it could even be the 37 degree heatwave we are experiencing in Gauteng today. If you know why this originated (or you think you know why) please comment on this post and let the readers of this blog know.

Twitter users have really embraced this hashtag today though. The #AskHelenZille hashtag has become a trending topic in South Africa and Globally on Twitter today. Not bad for a nation with about 100,000 active Twitter users (there could be more, but that’s my estimate). Some of the tweets that have come through so far are absolutely hilarious. Here are a few of them:

  • “Dear @helenzille do you perhaps know where 2pac is?” @adolicious1
  • “Dear Helen Zille, can fat people go skinny dipping?” @Nunucia
  • “@helenzille Does the easter bunny lay eggs??? ” @Dan531
  • “Dear @helenzille what did Fresca use to taste like?” @imJAMJAR_whoRu
  • “Dear @helenzille, Do you know what Meatloaf would not do for love? ” @KeenyKeenz
  • “Dear @helenzille when a fish dies out if water is it drowning in air?” @ninja_sne
  • “Dear @helenZille did you shut up when Bheki Cele told you to?” @Lil_Ms_Normans
  • “Dear @HelenZille.. Did the Bahamen ever find out who let the dogs out ??” @WyzeeQue
  • “Dear @HelenZille, was Bryce Lawrence paid off?” @Jacques_Music
  • “Dear @helenzille is there any reason why some people only watch porn on sundays?” @LesegoPhiri
  • “@helenzille If I am an Orphan, is Joshua Door still my Uncle?” @simmiareff
  • “Dear @HelenZille , why is the time when the traffic is slowest called rush-hour?” @EstoyRams
  • “Dear @helenzille, I spilled Head and Shoulders on my feet, and now I don’t know which half of my body to cover with pants?” @yazurd
  • “Dear @helenzille, my internet was down for a few hours… Did anyone ask me out?” @yazurd
  • “Dear @helenzille, is calling someone a ginger, racist?” @yazurd
  • “Dear @helenzille how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck would chuck wood?” @Kaula
  • “Hey @helenzille what’s the correct ratio of water to concentrate when makin Oros juice?”  @SimaRulz
  • “Dear @helenzille – Does Wikus stay a prawn!? #District9” @ShawnGraaff
  • “dear @helenzille is it true Popeye & Spinach are DA members?” @LoyisoSidimba
  • “@helenzille. Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego? ” @JayzussDear
  • “why did the chicken cross the road? #askhelenzille” @Arnie006
  • “Dear @helenzille,do u think the dalai lama can do the pantsula?” @eZulu
  • “Dear @helenzille, why is 7de Laan the only place where black people speak afrikaans to each other? ” XavierLoubser
  • “What’s the meaning of life? #askhelenzille” @SarahDuff
  • “Dear @helenzille Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?” @k3k3T50
  • “Dear Helen. Is Riaan Cruywagen really pickled in formaldehyde? #askhelenzille” @MelBendix
  • “Dear @helenzille when is the rapture going to take place? Regards, Harold Camping. ” @MarkPalmerComic
  • “Dear @helenzille where do broken hearts go?” @Jay_Mazz
  • “Dear @helenzille, there are several potholes in my road. Also, it burns when I pee. What should I do? ” @DeepFriedMan

This is probably one of the biggest trends in SA Twitter history. There are still tweets like this coming through today. Search for #AskHelenZille on Twitter to see what tweets are coming through from South African Twitter users. I use Tweetdeck. Last time I checked the #AskHelenZille hasthag search there were between 150 and 300 tweets coming through every 150 seconds.

If you have found funnier Tweets like the ones listed in the post, please comment on this post and RT this post on Twitter. You are also welcome to share this post on Facebook with your friends. Also feel free to check out the other posts in the Technology category.

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Henno Kruger
Blogger, Desktop Activist, Twitter / Facebook Addict, Music Festival Addict, Avid lover of South African music, Founder and owner of Running Wolf's Rant and co-founder of SA Music Zone
Henno Kruger

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  • We traced the origin of the AskHelenZille trend to Deep Fried Man:

    Whether it’s the right original source or not, I reckon it’s hilarious. I like that she has actually responded to the whole thing so positively as well – others politicians would be demanding the closure of Twitter…

  • Oh, and I meant to mention her latest response to one of the questions:

    The question: @FerretGee: Would you deny Bryce Lawrence a visa if you were President?
    Her response: Absolutely!!/helenzille/status/128477874436050944

  • Hi there. I started the trend this morning with the following tweet: “Ask @helenzille, my new advice column in which Helen Zille answers life’s difficult questions. Or ignores them” I then called on others to ask her questions and started asking my own with the #askhelenzille hashtag. I had heard that she had encouraged people to ask her questions on Twitter, and noticed how many people ask her pretty random things. I thought it would be funny if I parodied this and got others to join me. It kind of took on a life of it’s own after a couple hours. Twitter is like a full-time job sometimes. Except you don’t get paid 🙂 love and kisses.. Deep Fried Man

    • @Deep Fried Man: Thanks for clearing that up 🙂 Well done 🙂

    • Danny

      Do you know where it was trending at its highest? highest i saw was 4? props

      • @Danny I’m actually not sure, the last time I checked it was on number 8 worldwide (yesterday during the day)

      • Greg

        #4 on the list was the highest I noticed it too. It dropped off very quickly after 5pm when everyone using the company computer went home! And when the Americans woke up.

  • Nico

    “Why did Richie Macaw not make special mention of Bruce Lawrence in his post-match interview, and could this be construed as his denial of any intervention?

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