From Jane Goodall, to Sir David Attenborough and the late, great Steve Irwin, naturalists are the legends of our time. They’re probably the biggest #PartyAnimals around too. Only a party dude will jump out of an airboat to wrestle a crocodile. Well, Jose Cuervo is giving me the opportunity to join the ranks of these fine documentarians and to go down in history as an eagle-eyed super sleuth.
I need to spot one of these #PartyAnimals and take a photo of them, so I’m already keeping my eyes peeled…
The Sloth: Do not mistake this creatures for their sluggishness. Once in their natural habitat they become voracious feeders. They are not fond of movement, but they will engage in social routines with almost any species that passes them by. As time passes they become territorial and boisterous and eventually fatigue will overwhelm them and they will anchor themselves on any nearby object. You will find them exclusively at bar counters. Their call is usually something like “No bru, the dancefloor’s packed”.
The Peacock: This extravagant beast is definitely one of mother’s nature’s most breathtaking creations. They are easily identified (although they vary in size) by their bright colours. They are generally found near waterholes vying for position atop the highest perch. Once they have found a raised surface, they will begin to gyrate vigorously, emitting high pitched whooping calls. Eventually they’ll fall from the perch and injure themselves, or turn into professionals. You can find on top of speakers, bar counters, tables, the front of DJ boxes, any surface that is raised more than 5 cm. Their call is usually something like “This is my song!”.
The Parrot: Besides the fact that this creature may sound intelligent, they have simply learned to imitate the sounds made by others. They will repeat their call for as long as bystanders will permit them to. Just as you think they have stopped, they will start again. After telling a story several hundreds of times, they will often resort to focusing on the finer details, explaining and re-explaining, and then starting again. They can be found at bars at the back of dancefloors and their call is “Let me tell you something… bru… bru… let me tell you something….”
The Octopus: Despite the seemingly harmless nature of the attack, this species has been known to kill over 42 million vibes a year in Africa alone. Armed with a grasp that no amount of strength or requests to kindly get off can break, this multi-limbed specimen is rumored to cause severe irritation and in some cases, departure. They are native the back of the dancefloor and the middle of the bar and their call is “Heeeeeey! Long Time Bruuuu!”
The Mole: Crowds intimidate many creatures, but this species thrives in overpopulated areas. They have an uncanny ability to burrow through a seeming impenetrable mass and they get to where they want to go with alarming ease. They have been seen popping up in front of crowds and at the bar counter all over the globe and are somehow unscathed after passing directly under larger and more aggressive species. They can found EVERYWHERE and their call is “Sorry…Sorry…Sorry…Sorry”.
The Meerkat: This enthusiastic and highly social specimen has no set habitat but is generally spotted in crowds of their own species. Being excitable they tend to get carried away and wander from their family unit. At some point they’ll realize that they are alone. Confused and disorientated they will begin backtracking and looking for their pack by extending their necks and peeling over the crowd. They are usually found in, amongst and behind crowds. Their call is something like “Hey Dave…Dave? Dave? Dave? David? Daaaaavid!?!!!!!”.
The Eagle: This noble creature is seen soaring majestically above the crowds in every corner of the globe. There are minor variations, but their distinctive wingspan and call make them extremely easy to identify. They spend the majority of their lives with their eyes closed, navigating their way around, almost by ear. They will be occasionally found isolated in the middle of fields, but flocks have been known to number in their thousands. They are found EVERYWHERE, from the centre of crowds to several hundred metres away from ANYONE. Their call is a very distinctive “Wooooooooooooooooooooo” sound, you can’t miss them.
The Chameleon: Once these creatures reach adulthood they are able to blend into their surroundings perfectly. They have been known to shift from foraging and crawling to clean and distinguished in a matter of seconds. Their social camouflage includes the ability to change the pattern of their call (depending if they live at the coast or if they’re inland). Their habitat is unknown due to their ability to blend into surrounds, they are incredibly hard to identify. Their call is normally something like “AAAAY YEEEAHH! – good evening”.
The Caterpillar: This species is one of the most peculiar in all of the animal kingdom, moving erratically and seemingly without forethought. Having several heads, it often seems confused and disorientated, but it quickly becomes apparent that one of the heads is in charge and will bad-mouth the rest should they disagree or appear more attractive than the alpha-head. They are highly flexible creatures, even the largest of the species have been known to fit into a single bathroom stall. Their habitat is widespread, but they are generally found in and around bathrooms. They have several dozen high-pitched calls, all at once and at a raised volume.
The Bush Baby: They are a nocturnal species and they become increasingly active in the early hours of the morning. They have been known to cover huge distances in search of sustenance. They’re traits include a series of vigorous territorial dances which persist even when they’re completely alone. They’ll become skittish as daylight approaches and they will return to their den to rest until the day has passed. They can be found in the front and center and in dark corners. They communicate through dance.
I will be scanning the crowd at Jose Cuervo party in Newtown on Friday and I will be submitting my Jose Cuervo #PartyAnimals picture online on Friday night, so be on the lookout for me! I’m not hard to miss, I’m bald and I will be walking around with a camera bag.
Follow Jose Cuervo SA on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram and be on the lookout for my picture. If my photo gets the most likes I will win a R5000 cash prize. The official Twitter hashtags are #PartyAnimals and #WhosIn?, so keep your eyes on them too!
Become one of the #PartyAnimals this weekend at the Jose Cuervo shows in Johannesburg and Cape Town. The Subways (from the UK) and Fun Lovin’ Criminals (from the USA) will be performing along with some excellent SA bands and DJ’s. Tickets are available via Web Tickets and cost only R100. Even these penguins are in to party this coming weekend, check out the video below:
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