Author: Kobus Van Rooyen

Band Booking Agent, Tour Manager / Roadside Philosopher & Free Thinker.

Was julle al by Fokof Bar? Dis maklik om ‘n plek op te hype aan die begin. Dis hoekom ek besluit het om ‘n rukkie te wag voordat ek iets kwyt raak. Dis maklik om te gaan ‘Ja, die plek gaan great wees.. dit gaan werk en dit gaan ‘n sukses wees…’ Veral as dit kom by ‘n plek soos Fokof Bar en die mense agter dit. Ek meen, jy sit met ‘n wenspan. Tussen mense soos Robert en Tanje, Fokofpolisiekar en mense soos Louise Crouse kan jy nie verkeerd gaan nie. Vandat ek gehoor het Fokof Bar gaan oop…

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The past couple of weeks I have been depressed (or at least I think so). The word ‘depressed’ is thrown around lightly these days. So I don’t want to use it out of that accord but to show that most of us really have no idea what we feel. I don’t get paid enough, I don’t have a car. I don’t see my family much and I don’t have a girlfriend to share my intimate thoughts with. But I am still actually quite happy. Why then, my state of being in this moment of “time” ? I spend a lot…

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We’re always excited when May comes around. The prospect of heading to Mozambique for a weekend of sun, surf and music has to brighten anyone’s day. If not, there is no hope and you shouldn’t read further. Each year we head down to Ponta Malongane at the Southern tip of Mozambique to enjoy not only the sights that our splendid neighbouring country has to offer but to sit back, relax and listen to all the bands and artists performing at the STRAB festival. This year, General Motors SA were kind enough to support us on our journey and they provided…

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John Edward is a deucebag. Mark My Words. Find out why I say so, below. Those of you who know me, know that there are a lot of things I really don’t like. Homeopaths, most religions, Tom Cruise, Cryptozoology & bad music taste. But I have a special hatred for mediums. “Pshycics” piss me off to no end because I think it is unethical to dupe people out of their money by lying to them about how you have access to their dead relatives. I really blew my top yesterday when I read that world famous “medium” & all round…

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The world is full of terrible things. Dark, ugly, monstrous things that would make your stomach churn. Bile bears, child molestation, rape, Somali Pirates & cannibals are but a few things that are all too terrifying and unfortunately, all too real. Yet there are things, dangerous things that lurk in the open. Things that are passed off to us as art & culture. Things that make my blood boil & ears bleed… Yesterday, as I sat down in front of my laptop to get started on my administrative duties for the day, a former good friend assaulted my senses with…

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Yesterday, I read an article on the Daily Mail’s website which incited in me with a fair amount of disgust & sorrow. Most of my friends of British origin will tell you that the Daily Mail is a pretty shit source of actual news, but this story drew my attention as it contained a lot of key words that peaked my interest. Three teenage girls from Phoenix, Arizona apparently fly across the world & banish demons from people’s souls, freeing them from the pain of physical & sexual abuse.  These girls are led in their crusade by the father of…

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We live in a time of excess. Food, clothing, media, books, magazines. Everything there is out to get you and unfortunately quality isn’t the order of the day anymore. Excellence has been replaced by those who have the financial means to power the marketing machine. This means that we lose. Quality is sacrificed for quantity by those who have the power to make us think that they know better. What does this mean? It means that bored people now have the time to do shit they would never have been able to do in the past. A lonely housewife can…

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Hi Sunette & your team (of racist followers) I’m a young, virile, white, Afrikaans man. Unfortunately I have to write this letter in English.  I’m not sure what your linguistic capabilities are, but I’m sure if you put your mind to it you’ll be able to figure some of it out.  I have to warn you that I am going to use some complicated words & phrases but if you struggle reading this for some reason, I’m sure you can get your good friend Dan Roodt to help. It will also contain sarcasm.  I have found that most racist Afrikaners…

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So if you don’t know about it yet, Kate Middleton, Duchess of Cambridge & wife to Prince William’s baby is on the way. People are going crazy. This apparently is what is considered news today. This is not news. This is the furthest thing from news out there at the moment. ‘Celebrity’ babies are irrelevant. This specific baby is even more irrelevant. The royal family is purely a nostalgic throwback to times gone by & culturally they are not relevant to modern society & especially not to the rest of the world. Even if you happened to be a former…

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I have been working hard and partying hard at Oppikoppi for years. It is now 29 days until we all hit the awesomeness that will be Oppikoppi 2013 Bewilderbeast. Are you excited? I surely am… This year I will once again be stage managing one of the main stages & I have decided to share my list of things I use. I’m sharing this list with you in order to help you make your Oppikoppi experience better. So here goes: 1. Tent: Obviously if you are not staying in one of the nice tented hotels, you need a place to…

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So, for those of you who haven’t heard the news yet. The South African Music Video channel MK is going off air at the end of July and will be moving to an online only platform. Many people have seen this coming and there was not much surprise as most people agree that MK has lost it touch in the past couple of years. Seemingly run by people who lacked creativity and imagination, bombarding us with silly inserts and promo clips whilst simultaneously subjecting us to a bunch of second rate shows and presenters, the end was always in sight. Spokespeople for MK have…

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